Sometimes I'd rather stay home and watch tv

Alissa's Advice for Bad Dates:

"You can't get to the buried treasure without digging through the dirt, can you?"

Will try to remember that.

I don't want to be famous

I feel like I could lose credibility but... should I do it, anyway? Apply for the Bachelor?

Not Getting Excited

Answered the phone. He speaks like Dan from Up with People, it was kind of freaking me out. He asked if I was free tomorrow. I said yes, let's get coffee. He said he knew my neighborhood. I said how about the Dazbog on 17th? He said a what? I said Dazbog, it is a coffee shop. He said oh I live off of Colorado. I said ok..., well we could go somewhere around there. He said how about dinner instead? I said fine (getting annoyed). He said where would you want to go? I said I don't really know that area. He asked well what kind of food would you want? Then he named off types of foods, Mexican, Thai, etc. (At this point thinking to myself, so you change the plans I came up with to make me pick new plans?). I said I don't really care. He says we can pick tomorrow or go out in my neighborhood. I say let's just make some plans and stick with it. I have missed two Golden Globes acceptance speeches, at this point, including the one from Precious. He picks Indian food. I say okay (even though I just had Indian food but frankly I didn't want to miss another speech with this debate).

Whoa! I thought I just saw Christina Aguilear's boob but it's just an unfortunate dress.

So, I guess I have a dinner date tomorrow. It's a 6 so if no one hears from me by 8:30 call my ninja protective team aka Chea and David, codenames: Asian Ankle Biter aka AAD and the White Man Who Can Jump aka Jumpy.

Indecisive and making me sit in the traffic. Neato, maybe I'll just send Jumpy and AAD to take him out.

PS. Now I feel guilty for being so judgmental. He may be excited and may be trying hard. Then I just be kind of a jerk. Boo me, boo. Boo dating.

Dear Kristen, Don't Be a Wuss.

Ok. I didn't know whether I should write about this but it's kind of cheating the process if I don't.

On Friday, (Mom and any other family members reading this, you might want to stop now.) I sent a proposal to a fellow I've known a while with the encouragement of Zachy, so he can be partially blamed. (Mom, seriously stop reading). It may have gone something like this, "Hi, want to make out tonight?" Logistics were set up. His arrival at my apartment happened. I suddenly, lost my boldness and became amazingly awkward. I know if you send the suggestive text message it's your job to make the move but I got more like myself and chickened out. This lameness, on my part, continued for about two hours. Two hours of strange television watching. Craig Ferguson is funny but not exactly mood music. So he must figure after two hours that I'm not going to do anything and gets up to leave. I pull out my last card. The Pouting Card. It hasn't failed me yet and didn't fail me this time either. A little pout and a fake good-bye hug later and we have makey outey. Two hours of makey outey to counter two awkward hours. Word. Now you know, Mom.